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ALAS, IN WANDERLAND, SEA CZAR CITY, VOL. 6, PAGE 18

I went to the day phone and called the office.

My preceptionist, Helen Wheels said, “Boss, even though you don’t have your car, your still going to need to parka.

Conya Penny called to say she needs to see you at Polly Latchkey on Mount Seeall right away.”

Polly Latchkey (named after one of the clown heads of Europe) is where Gulp Island resorts to sport in  winter.

It has Downhill Fleeing, The Lunge and Slow Boring.

Helen was right, like a good paint job, I’d need a second coat.

michaellewisart

SNOW BUSINESS

 

ALAS, IN WANDERLAND,SEA CZAR CITY, VOL. 6, PAGE 17

“Speaking of the Longview’, Lee Z. interrupted, “thats why I eclipsed my honeymoon.

Spooks have been hitting the cemetery at night and leaving no stone unturned.

Mayor Major Minor thinks that because I use to be an awning salesman, I’d be the perfect guy to deal with shades.

Did you guys hear that Gordon George Guzzler at the Car Tomb Junkyard, found a giant Sumatran rat in a box of old Stand Magazines and named it Mycrock?

These aren’t bad brat worst but if you fellows want good eats, you should try Taiwan Hon’s Wine Dinning.

The food has gotten much better since Hon hired the new Sioux chef, Shy Ann trail.”

michaellewisart

GORDON GEORGE OF THE CAR TOMB

 

 

ALAS, IN WANDERLAND, SEA CZAR CITY, VOL. 6, PAGE 16

When we got to the Ale And Shovel Inn, I ordered Low Brow  beer, bratworst, and dour kraut all around.

I plugged a nickel in the jutebox to hear Sunset John La Prairie’s new home wrecker’s ballad: “Rafter, Your Gone”.

Jitters said the eerie moan we heard last night wasn’t one of  the ones that have been coming from the Longview Cemetery, it was from the lycanthrope, Claud Marx, being held at bay by a pack of nymphs.

“The Blue Ferry found him this morning, fur gone and floating in the water.

They brought him to the Abandon Hope Hospital “, said Jitters ,” a wolf in ship’s clothing.”

michaellewisart

HELD AT BAY

 
 

ALAS, IN WANDERLAND, SEA CZAR CITY, VOL. 6, PAGE 15

I convinced Banter to hang a “Gone Wishin”” sign on the door and join Jitters, Lee Z. and I for a trolley out to the Ale And Shovel.

I thought maybe we’d pick up Jerry Rigg on the way.

But Lee Z. said that the “All Thumbs” carpenter has been as busy as a bee with hives.

“He re-pared an orchard for Reggie Farmer”, said Lee Z.

“He fenced  a sword fish for Siren Sally.

He did some rock work for Sessions Records.

Built a bridge for the dentist, Dee Kade and a cabinet for the Prime Sinister.

Just last week, he finished a new front for the Seamen’s Duffle Hotel after the minotaur, Bison Bill tossed ‘Sockjaw’ Beef Strongenuff, through the wall for calling Bill’s girlfriend, a real cow.

No bull!

And now that The Lovecraft is detoxing in dry dock, Crab Carp wants Jerry to give her a new coat of colour.”

michaellewisart

RENOVATION

 

 
 

ALAS, IN WANDERLAND, SEA CZAR CITY, VOL. 6, PAGE 14

Hudson Day was found in winter, as frozen as an Eskimo lie.

His boots were covered in dinahshore grease, bronchialsoreus bone broth and trysarahtop tears, the big goop, black gold.

His last words were:” Oil well that ends well.”

From then on his spectre haunted Thawsom Creek, trying to get back to his gusher.

Then only eight weeks ago, the earth opened its big mouth and he put his foot in it.

It was at that point that R.J. Hatrack shook with a shade and Haul Street dubbed the duo, “The Gas Pack “.

The Hudhat Gas  Co. was born.

michaellewisart

THE GAS PACK

 
 

ALAS, IN WANDERLAND, SEA CZAR CITY, VOL. 6, PAGE 13

As I read Justa Fortune’s tale of wretched success, I pondered the stories (minus the 13th floor) that went into the Legend Of The Lost Lunchman”s Mind.

How so little is known about Hudson Day,

Except that after finishing his lamb jam sand witch, he made the myth take of asking a hard of herring fisherman, the way to the dessert.

They say it was the setting off through the sand that sealed his dune.

He was seen, off and yawn, with his horse, Whisper and his mule. Pumps, pulling the Rover Tale Wagon and babbling like a book: “Ample pie, please cake, oakmeal cookies.”

MICHAELLEWISART

HUDSON DAY, THE LOST LUNCHMAN

 
 

ALAS, IN WANDERLAND, SEA CZR CITY, VOL.6, PAGE 12

When I walked through Banter’s door, there was the newly wetted Lee Z. Gladstone saying: “She was only a mail carrier’s daughter but oh how she could play Post Office.

She was just one of those sorts.”

” Cut short your trip to Viagra Falls, Lee Z.?” I asked.

“I don’t let any grass grow under my sheets, Dumbclue.”

“Hey P.I.” Banter asked, “did you see your granddamn landed on the cover of Vague Magazine?”

Sure enough there it was, :” JUSTA HATRACK, FORMER MONKBOY PLAYDATE AND NIGHTSTAND NURSE, NOW CEREAL BOX GIVEAWAY HEIRESS TELLS ALL, FROM PIX TO TRIX, TO OUR FANNY MAY HERT”

michaellewisart

HOT OFF THE PRESSES

 
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Posted by on January 23, 2018 in storybook for punloving adults

 
 
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